Escaping the Grip of FOMO: How a Generation is Redefining Success

In an age where every moment is Instagrammed and every achievement tweeted, the Fear of Missing Out—popularly known as FOMO—has become a defining phenomenon of our times. For many young adults, the incessant stream of curated lives online breeds an unsettling anxiety: Is everyone living a better life than me?

The Origins and Rise of FOMO

The term FOMO was first coined by marketing strategist Dr. Dan Herman in 1996 and gained widespread recognition in the early 2010s with the advent of social media platforms like Facebook and Instagram. A 2013 study published in Computers in Human Behavior by Dr. Andrew Przybylski of the University of Oxford delved into the psychological underpinnings of FOMO. The research found that individuals with lower levels of satisfaction in basic psychological needs—competence, autonomy, and relatedness—were more susceptible to experiencing FOMO.

“FOMO is essentially a manifestation of our fundamental need to belong and to be in the know,” explains Dr. Przybylski. “Social media exacerbates this by providing endless opportunities for social comparison.”

The Psychological Toll of Constant Comparison

A 2017 study in the American Journal of Preventive Medicine surveyed 1,787 U.S. adults aged 19–32 and found a strong correlation between heavy social media use and perceived social isolation. Participants who spent more than two hours per day on social media were twice as likely to report feelings of social isolation than those who spent less than 30 minutes per day.

Dr. Brian Primack, the study’s lead author and director of the Center for Research on Media, Technology, and Health at the University of Pittsburgh, notes, “We are inherently social creatures, but modern life tends to compartmentalize us instead of bringing us together. While social media is often touted as a way to connect, it may actually exacerbate feelings of isolation for some.”

Further research by the Royal Society for Public Health in the UK in 2017 surveyed 1,479 young people aged 14–24 and found that Instagram was associated with increased levels of anxiety, depression, and FOMO. The report, titled “Status of Mind,” highlighted how social media platforms contribute to unrealistic expectations and create feelings of inadequacy and low self-esteem.

Economic Factors Amplifying FOMO

The economic landscape has also played a role in intensifying FOMO among young adults. According to a 2019 report by the Federal Reserve, millennials earn 20% less than baby boomers did at the same stage of life, despite being better educated. The rising costs of education and housing, coupled with wage stagnation, have made traditional milestones like home ownership and financial stability more elusive.

“There’s a pervasive sense of falling behind,” says Dr. Jean Twenge, a psychology professor at San Diego State University and author of iGen. “When young people see peers achieving certain milestones—or appearing to—they may feel increased pressure and anxiety.”

The Paradox of Connectivity

While social media platforms were designed to connect people, they often have the opposite effect. A 2018 study published in the Journal of Social and Clinical Psychology by researchers at the University of Pennsylvania conducted an experimental study limiting social media use. Participants who limited their use to 30 minutes per day over three weeks reported significant reductions in loneliness and depression.

Lead researcher Melissa G. Hunt explains, “Our study suggests that limiting social media use to approximately 30 minutes per day may lead to significant improvement in well-being. It’s not about completely eliminating social media, but about using it more mindfully.”

Strategies for Overcoming FOMO

Recognizing the impact of FOMO on mental health, individuals and experts alike are advocating for strategies to mitigate its effects.

1. Mindful Social Media Use

Implementing conscious control over social media habits can reduce FOMO. Tools like Apple’s Screen Time or apps like Moment can help track and limit usage.

2. Practicing Gratitude

Dr. Robert Emmons, a professor of psychology at the University of California, Davis, and a leading expert on gratitude, has found that regularly practicing gratitude can increase happiness and reduce depression. Keeping a gratitude journal, where one writes down things they are thankful for, can shift focus from what one lacks to what one has.

3. Embracing JOMO (Joy of Missing Out)

The concept of JOMO encourages individuals to find joy in what they are doing in the present moment, without worrying about what others are doing. In a 2019 article in Forbes, tech entrepreneur Anil Dash discusses how embracing JOMO can lead to a more fulfilling life by reducing the stress associated with constant connectivity.

4. Building Real-World Connections

Investing time in face-to-face interactions can alleviate feelings of isolation. The Harvard Study of Adult Development, one of the longest-running studies on happiness, has shown that close relationships, more than money or fame, are what keep people happy throughout their lives.

5. Setting Personal Goals

Focusing on personal growth rather than external comparisons can provide a sense of purpose. A 2015 study in the Journal of Personality found that individuals who pursued self-concordant goals—those aligned with their intrinsic interests and values—reported higher levels of well-being.

Technology Companies Respond

Recognizing the detrimental effects of social media overuse, some tech companies have introduced features to help users manage their time online. In 2018, both Facebook and Instagram launched activity dashboards that allow users to monitor their daily usage and set reminders to limit time on the apps.

Instagram CEO Adam Mosseri has acknowledged the platform’s impact on mental health, stating in a 2019 interview with the BBC, “We want to make sure that people feel good about the time they spend on Instagram, and that it’s time well spent.”

A Cultural Shift Toward Authenticity

There’s a growing movement among influencers and celebrities to present a more authentic version of themselves on social media. Campaigns like #nofilter and #bodypositivity aim to challenge unrealistic standards.

Actress Jameela Jamil launched the “I Weigh” movement on Instagram to promote self-worth beyond physical appearance. In a 2020 interview with The Guardian, she said, “We need to see our value and stop measuring ourselves against unrealistic standards.”

The Younger Generation Leading the Way

Generation Z appears to be more aware of the pitfalls of social media. A 2019 survey by Piper Jaffray found that while 85% of teens use Instagram, there’s a growing preference for more private forms of communication like messaging apps.

“There’s a shift toward more authentic and ephemeral content,” says Dr. Twenge. “Younger users are gravitating toward platforms where they can be themselves without the pressure of likes and followers.”

An Ongoing Journey

As society grapples with the implications of constant connectivity, individuals are finding ways to reclaim their time and mental well-being. The journey away from FOMO is not about disconnecting entirely but about forging a healthier relationship with technology and redefining personal success.

In a world where everyone’s highlight reel is at our fingertips, perhaps the most radical act is to look inward, embrace our own path, and find contentment in the here and now.